0 Cart
Added to Cart
    You have items in your cart
    You have 1 item in your cart
    Check Out Continue Shopping

    Blogs — Post Partum

    Why I went from social butterfly to hermit

    Why I went from social butterfly to hermit

    Probably a slight exaggeration but for most of my adult life, whether it be at uni, work, playing sport, having dinner, meeting friends for coffee or drinks or dancing into the early hours, I spent it out.  The place where I rented was less a home than somewhere to sleep and get ready to go somewhere.  I would often pack something in every evening and often have back to back engagements.  After we bought a home, in my first pregnancy, except when the first trimester simply wiped me out and I often found myself fallen asleep on the sofa at 8pm, I was still going out regularly. 

    Then my life changed. Forever.  No longer could I stay out all day and night.  No longer the spontaneity.  No longer the freedom.  From the moment my eldest was born I was confined to my house for a month.  Except for medical appointments I did not leave my house.  My mum tried to restrict me to the confines of my room in the first week after birth but I did wander around the house albeit slowly.  It was the middle of winter, cold, dreary and dark by 4pm and I actually welcomed the ‘excuse’ to stay in with my baby.  I was not looking forward to go out for the first time for my little boy’s one month birthday celebration.  The drizzly rain didn’t help. I did it but was glad to get back indoors.

    After my month’s confinement I took the baby out and about during the day, we slowly built up a social life with other mummies and babies but the evenings I was always at home or at my parents’.  Partly because my other half works ridiculously long and unsociable hours, my friends with kids also stayed at home, and my friends without kids didn’t want to do baby friendly things in the evenings - taking a baby to the bar is probably not high up on the ‘great parenting list’.  Pumping was a nightmare so it didn’t really encourage me to express.  We tried taking little one out for dinner a few times but he was so unsettled that it made dinner out more of a chore than staying in.  So except on a handful of times I stopped going out in the evenings unless it was a special occasion. 

    Of course there were times when I would have loved to catch up with my friends baby free but on the whole I didn’t really pine to go out.  I didn’t envy my friends who could spontaneously pop to Paris for a weekend. I had time to sit down - on my own.  I could wash up undisturbed. I could have a shower in peace!.  I could sleep.  I was so tired that I slept shortly after the baby slept in the evenings. I can imagine if you’re one of the first in your circle of friends to have children how left out it could feel.  No one else understands that you can’t meet up like you used to and the main way to keep in touch is through whatsapp.  I was lucky enough that most of my friends had babies within a year of each other so we were all in the same boat.  We kept each other entertained with our baby stories,  we vented to each other and we supported each other.  I was lucky to have a great support network so I didn’t feel too lonely in the evenings when hubby was at work.

    For mums who don’t have friends with kids there are so many groups that you can join to meet local mums. I found it so much easier to chat to someone with a child just because you immediately have something in common.  The eye contact. The acknowledge of ‘I know what you’re going through’.  All it takes is ‘how old is your baby’ and there you go. You can start a friendship. 

    Protect your health after having a baby

    Protect your health after having a baby

    We all take so much care of our bodies when we want to become pregnant and then even more so during our pregnancy as we miraculously grow our baby but once our baby is born it doesn't stop there. Have a read a read of some tips of my personal top 5 ways to protect your health for after your baby is born. 

    Read more

    What to expect after birth - you: Tips on how to cope with it all

    What to expect after birth - you: Tips on how to cope with it all

    Having a baby is a big deal. To be blessed with a beautiful baby is the most incredible gift you could ever wish for but it’s a huge strain on your body during pregnancy, birth, not to mention the physical and mental exhaustion of looking after your baby. Before I had my first baby I had no idea of what would happen to my body after birth. I thought the hard bit would be labour itself. No, the hard bit was labour but I didn't realise the physical and emotional feelings you would experience, particularly the first few days after birth. Apart from looking after a newborn baby little did I know that I had to prepare for post labour too. Both Connie and I delivered all our children vaginally so we wanted to share some helpful tips on how to cope immediately after a vaginal birth.

    Going to the toilet
    • Use a jug or cup to pour warm water whilst you’re peeing – this will definitely help with any stinging down below
    • If you need to go for a poo – don’t’ worry about stitches – they won’t come out when you go. You should go when you feel like it and not hold it in for fear as this may lead to constipation.
    • Wash with warm plain water and pat dry – don’t use any soaps.
    • If you have not had a bowel movement for a few days, seek medical advice.
    Vaginal bleeding – or ‘lochia’ – the blood, mucus, and uterine tissue that typically lasts for 4 to 6 weeks after birth.
    • Use maxi sanitary towels initially – the padded ones not the ultra thin ones for more absorbency.
    • Change them regularly (at least every 2-3 hours) to help keep the vaginal area clean and free from infection.
    • If you need to change more than every hour or if you have blood clots passing through that are larger than a 50p – seek medical advice.
    Stitches – if you needed stitches after a tear or an episiotomy be assured that the discomfort/pain will go away – usually within a week.
    • You can use paracetamol and ibuprofen safely even during breastfeeding.
    • If you find sitting uncomfortable, try using a pillow or soft cushion or even a towel rolled up into a doughnut.
    • Wash using a bowl of plain warm water – a sitz – and pat dry – don’t rub.
    • After going for a poo – wipe front to back, plain Water Wipes may help initially if you find dry toilet paper too painful, then wash as above.
    Haemorrhoids are common during pregnancy and after childbirth – not surprising with all the pushing.
    • You may find soaking in warm water may give you some relief.
    • You could also use an ice pack to reduce the swelling or even alternate with ice and warm water soaks.
    • Sit on a pillow or soft cushion, or a rolled towel in a donut
    • Wash after going to the toilet, wash using a sitz.
    • You can try the different haemorrhoid creams.
    • If it’s really painful you can use paracetamol and ibuprofen safely in breastfeeding
    • Make sure you have lots of fibre (fruit and veg) in your diet, plenty of water, go when you have the urge. Don’t wait.

    Faecal and urine incontinenceurinary incontinence is very common – almost a third of women, get this and can take up to 3-6 months to recover although doing kegel exercises to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles can help you speed things up.

    Weight – I was under the impression that as soon as I had my baby, my belly would be back to my normal size! However, immediately after giving birth you will feel like you still have a baby inside you and look about 7 months pregnant. You will slowly lose this as your uterus shrinks back to size. 

    • Don’t rush into exercising too early because you need to rest after birth. Gentle walking and kegel (pelvic floor muscle) exercises are a good idea.
    • Your abdominal muscles need to contract. You need
    • A healthy diet including fruit and veg is important.
    • Wait until your 6 week postnatal check up with your GP before starting more vigorous exercise.

    Breast feeding – drink lots of fluids – drinking a glass with each feed will make sure you’re well hydrated. For other breastfeeding advice please speak to your midwife.

    Sleep when your baby sleeps – the best advice in the initial period. I really wished I listened to this advice a bit more when I only had the one child.

    Try not to plan too many events in your diary for the first few days, even weeks after giving birth. Yes you may want to show off your proud bundle of joy to the world but enjoy this precious newborn time getting to know your baby, bonding as a family and to look after yourself.

    Your hormones can play havoc – you may be feeling elated one minute and be sobbing the next. The responsibility of looking after a little baby who entirely depends on you, the changes in hormones and sleep deprivation can contribute to ‘baby blues’. This is entirely normal and will soon pass in a week or so.  This shouldn’t be confused with post-natal depression that starts from around 14 days to up to a year after birth.  Try to share your worries.  There are lots of mummy groups for support, speak to your midwife or GP, ask for your help.  Share your worries.

    Lower your standards for housekeeping and don’t expect to be preparing gourmet meals.

    Accept help, ask for help, limit the number of visitors during the first few days.

    And the most useful advice I’ve had is - don’t expect daddy to have the same instinct as you – he doesn’t have the hormones.


    Other useful articles

    Newborn Baby Essentials Recommended by Onco

    Newborn Baby Essentials Recommended by Onco

    Where do I start? Many of you will ask this question in preparation for a newborn as there are so many things out there that you can buy for baby so we have made this list of essentials items of what we found useful for when your baby arrives. We have added links to some items we recommend.   



    •   nursing bras - at least enough for a laundry cycle
    •   nursing tops - normal loose tops or those with buttons/zips at the front are just as practical and perhaps more cost effective if you don't want to buy the specific nursing tops.
    •   nursing nightwear - or pjs/nighties that you can unbutton at the front will do too.
    •   nipple cream - especially for the initial period of breastfeeding. 
    •   nursing pads - you'll need at least one pair a day depending on how much you leak. 

    Bottles feeding

    •   pick from a variety of bottles and teats to find the one baby likes best
    •   steriliser to keep them squeaky clean too 
    •   feeding pillow - added comfort and ease for you and baby whilst feeding. 
    •   muslin cloths - at least one a day for leaks/spills/possets/vomits, varies from
    • baby to baby
    •   breastfeeding cover - we highly recommend a cover for mothers who prefer to be discreet when breastfeeding their child in public places.


    It is recommended that your baby stays in the same room as you for the first six months of life.

    •   crib/cot/cotbed - a crib usually lasts til the baby is around 6 months, a cot until they're around 2-3yo depending on the size of cot/child and a cotbed until around 4yo.
    •   lightweight Moses basket - although not essential, these are useful for the initial newborn stage before transitioning to the static bed or for use when moving around the house. These basket have an age limit of around 6m, however we found they do quickly outgrow these.
    •   waterproof mattress cover, fitted sheets and cellular blankets - two sets for laundry
    •   baby sleeping bags for a winter baby x2
    •   room thermometer
    •   baby monitor - although not a very essential equipment - having one gives you peace of mind whilst you leave the baby in another room.


    •   vests - if you have a winter baby you only need plain ones as they will get covered up by baby gros and body suits. Usually only 1 a day is required but on days where you may have a few more leaks, then I would factor 2-3 a day to last your wash cycle.
    •   body suits - usually only 1 a day but again factor potential leaks.
    •   mittens - 2 pairs 
    •   a hat whilst out and about - they do not need to wear it at home
    •   a cellular blanket x 2
    •   bibs - for dribbles - not necessary at newborn stage but when your baby starts to dribble a bit more then usually one a day unless teething when you can go through 5-6 a day
    •   non-biological detergent - avoids allergic reactions in babies as they're free from enzymes

    Nappy changing

    •   nappies - initially around 10 a day if not more
    •   cotton wool balls
    •   baby wipes - for when you're out and about
    •   nappy sacks - basic brand is good enough
    •   changing mat
    •   Travel changing mat - for when you're out and about
    •   nappy cream - babies tend to get a little nappy rash particularly in the newborn stages so we recommend lots of nappy free time


    Newborns usually just need a quick top and tail at first, using cotton wool or a sponge but once you start giving them a bath you will find these useful.

    •   baby bath
    •   bath support - gives you confidence whilst bathing your baby. We recommend Angelcare.
    •   soft hooded baby towels x 2
    •   baby shampoo/wash - not required as plain water is perfect for a newborn baby but as they get a little bit older, you may want something to give them a wash. We recommend Weleda.
    •   bath thermometer - see room thermometer


    Day to Day

    •   baby carrier - a life saver, a must in our opinion
    •   buggy organiser - for those who walk and use your travel system often, we found the buggy bags so useful to keep things at hands reach, such as water bottles, phone, wipes.
    •   car seat - this is a legal requirement if you want to transport your newborn back home in a car. We also recommend you use a car seat protector to protect your car seat from indentations.
    •   car seat mirror - perfect to check on your baby
    •   travel system/pram/stroller - your baby needs to be lying flat for the first 6 months. We also recommend using a stroller bag to keep all your essentials within easy reach when out and about
    •   stroller liner for all seasons